my boyfriend broke up with me
I just want to know
when you close your eyes during sex
are you thinking about your ex
or the next?
I don’t have a sex drive
All these people with their pseudo-existentialist, hormonal, self-absorbed depression. I hate comparing woes. But I watched my father die starving and in pain. I can’t sympathize with people who complain about their lethargic personalities or crooked nose.
The problem with love is that you never fall out of it. Even if they were cruel, or maybe amazing and too good for you. You can love one person or ten people. But you won’t stop. It’s so scary. What if I think of my high school or college lovers at the alter? What if I never stop thinking about my other lovers. It’s manic. I only want good things for the people who crushed me. I only want them to be successful and happy. I want them to want that for me too, but they probably don’t.
I wish I never felt this strongly about people I’ve been with. I’m 19. I don’t deserve these powerful emotions. I will always love you.